Let's again talk about the interesting things that happen at the courthouse. If I did not work for a very nice, upstanding, honest lawyer, I would never have any need to go to the courthouse. At least, I don't think I would have any need. But as paperwork runs the legal system, I had to contribute yet again by filing an eviction complaint for a new client of ours. So, I went over at the end of the day, because typically there are fewer "defendants" there at that time of day. Unfortunately, there were lots of other people who had to add paper to the legal system, so I waited patiently for my turn.
As I stood in line to go through the oh-so-fabulous metal detector, I had the pleasure of witnessing another genius at work. By the time I joined the line, he had pretty much stripped off anything that might contain and metal and had created a pile on the table next to the metal detector. Yet, every time he walked through the dumb thing, it went off like a siren. So, the constable says: "Are your boots steel-toed?" To which the gentlemen responds: "No." So he walks through again, still setting off the alarm. The constable says: "Are you sure your boots aren't steel-toed?" Man's reply: "No they aren't steel-toed, but they do have these metal rivets all over them." (Stated as he lifts up his pant leg to show us all that he's wearing ugly black boots that are simply COVERED in metal. Really? He had no other shoes he could wear to the courthouse. Flip flops even? It was a somewhat warm Utah day. Anyway, the constable tells him he will have to take off his boots and send them through the x-ray machine. He gets all onery and walks to the bench to take off his boots. Honestly.
Enter the bad news: Somewhere between handing the documents to Dave (my boss) to sign and his handing them back to me to put in my little folder (see previous post) I lost half of what I needed to take to the court clerk. So, when I got to the desk and she started going through it, she couldn't find the first half of the coversheet that has all the important information she needs to file the complaint. I ended up waiting in line to get through the metal detector and again in line to speak to a clerk, all for nothing. I had to gather what I had and wander back to the office to try and figure out what happened. This was two days ago, and I still have not found the other parts of the documents. I just reprinted what I needed and took it home with me so I would stop on the way to work the next morning. So, I went through the mess I was trying to avoid the following morning in dealing with more people there to plead their supposed innocence before I left the courthouse thanking Heavenly Father that I have good people in my life. Because if I had to deal with that population all the time like my Brian does, I would go CRAZY!!!
Friday, February 27, 2009
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
I'm sorry, but I have to vent
Let me tell you a little story that is indicative of what I deal with on a regular basis. This morning, first thing, I stopped at the Salt Lake County courthouse in West Jordan. This is convenient because it's literally a block away from my house, and we file a lot of our cases there, as it's less busy than the courthouse downtown. Anyway, this is not the first time I have had to go there on my way in to work. I find it's easier to drop things off in the morning, because then I don't have to stress about trying to get there before they lock the doors, promptly at 5 pm. (I have missed it in the past.) So, I walk in to the courthouse and join my place in line. Luckily, I was there before the 8:25 rush. You see, there are several things going on all at once. There are lots of people who have done stupid things and been caught doing them. And, when their court date arrives, they have to appear before the court. (Not rocket science.) The list for defendant's and which judge and courtroom they will be required to be in is posted at 8 am every morning. Most of these accused criminals get there at around 8:25, hence the rush. If you are not in the courtroom you are supposed to be, you will be held in contempt, and an warrant is issued for your arrest. It creates a lot of trouble when these people cut the deadline so close.
OK, now that you understand what I'm trying to avoid, let me tell you what happened this morning. I was lucky enough to get there just before the line started forming. I was patiently waiting my turn to go through the metal detector. I'm a thinker and a planner, all three of you who read this know this about me. So, when I go to the courthouse, I take with me: 1-my car keys, I have to get back in when I'm done; 2-my coat if it's cold out, and the pockets are completely empty; 3-my cell phone in case I need to call one of my fabulous co-workers with questions about what I'm filing; and 4-whatever it is that I need to take to the court. That's it. Nothing in my pants pockets, no purse, nothing. If I will need to pay a filing fee, I have a check signed and ready to go. If I need something printed, I will stash cast in my pocket cause they charge 25 cents for every stinkin' page they print for you. Otherwise, that's it. I'm guessing that the gentleman in front of me in the line for the metal detector did not plan as well as I usually do. This is why I think that: (The conversation with the deputy at the detector went like this)
Guy: I have to take everything out of my pockets?
Deputy: No, just things that will not pass the metal detector, and that includes your belt.
Guy: Ok, well what about my wallet?
Deputy: Does it have metal in it?
Guy: No
Deputy: Then no
Guy: Here's my belt (it was one of those nasty ones that looks like old car seat upholstery)
Deputy: Do you have spare change in your pockets? (I'm guessing in response to the jingling of the change that we all heard. Yes, coins are metal, they will set off metal detectors.)
Guy: Yeah
Deputy: Please put it in the bin too
Guy: (digs out the change in his pocket) Here are my car keys (like the deputy needs commentary on what's coming out of the guy's pockets-sheesh)
Now, here's where it gets really interesting. I'm wondering if he thought that the deputy would not notice this in the first place and maybe he could sneak it by, or if the guy really was this dumb, but as he's pulling the small pocket knife out of his pocket he says, "Here's my weapon"
Seriously
I'm not kidding
He said that.
Now, it's not like this thing was a machete. But, obviously, weapons of any kind are not allowed in the courthouse. Common sense, right? The deputy then tells him that he'll have to take that out to his car, because they will not hold any personal items while you are in the courthouse-understandably.
So, smart guy leaves his wallet, his belt, his spare change--grabs his keys--and goes to put his "weapon" in his car.
So I think to myself: Was he hoping the deputy wouldn't notice that there was a picket knife in the midst of all his crap? If so, why bring attention to it by referring to it as your "weapon"? Or, was he so nervous about trying to sneak it in that he blurted it out? Or was he just dumb enough to not think ahead about the fact that he had to go through a metal detector AND that knives, regardless of their size and lethalness (yes I realize that is a word I just made up) are not allowed into a courthouse?
I'm going with the last option. I skirted around as he walked past me and watched as his dead-behind-the-eyes wife wandered around looking for the docket to find out what courtroom they needed to report to. I then put my simple manilla folder with documents to be filed and my keys in the bin and walked through the metal detector. (I didn't take my phone because this time, I knew I wouldn't need to call anyone.) I actually spent more time watching this yahoo and his antics than I did filing the documents with the court clerk. As I was walking back to my car, he was walking back in to the courthouse. I would love to be a fly on the wall in that courtroom!
OK, now that you understand what I'm trying to avoid, let me tell you what happened this morning. I was lucky enough to get there just before the line started forming. I was patiently waiting my turn to go through the metal detector. I'm a thinker and a planner, all three of you who read this know this about me. So, when I go to the courthouse, I take with me: 1-my car keys, I have to get back in when I'm done; 2-my coat if it's cold out, and the pockets are completely empty; 3-my cell phone in case I need to call one of my fabulous co-workers with questions about what I'm filing; and 4-whatever it is that I need to take to the court. That's it. Nothing in my pants pockets, no purse, nothing. If I will need to pay a filing fee, I have a check signed and ready to go. If I need something printed, I will stash cast in my pocket cause they charge 25 cents for every stinkin' page they print for you. Otherwise, that's it. I'm guessing that the gentleman in front of me in the line for the metal detector did not plan as well as I usually do. This is why I think that: (The conversation with the deputy at the detector went like this)
Guy: I have to take everything out of my pockets?
Deputy: No, just things that will not pass the metal detector, and that includes your belt.
Guy: Ok, well what about my wallet?
Deputy: Does it have metal in it?
Guy: No
Deputy: Then no
Guy: Here's my belt (it was one of those nasty ones that looks like old car seat upholstery)
Deputy: Do you have spare change in your pockets? (I'm guessing in response to the jingling of the change that we all heard. Yes, coins are metal, they will set off metal detectors.)
Guy: Yeah
Deputy: Please put it in the bin too
Guy: (digs out the change in his pocket) Here are my car keys (like the deputy needs commentary on what's coming out of the guy's pockets-sheesh)
Now, here's where it gets really interesting. I'm wondering if he thought that the deputy would not notice this in the first place and maybe he could sneak it by, or if the guy really was this dumb, but as he's pulling the small pocket knife out of his pocket he says, "Here's my weapon"
Seriously
I'm not kidding
He said that.
Now, it's not like this thing was a machete. But, obviously, weapons of any kind are not allowed in the courthouse. Common sense, right? The deputy then tells him that he'll have to take that out to his car, because they will not hold any personal items while you are in the courthouse-understandably.
So, smart guy leaves his wallet, his belt, his spare change--grabs his keys--and goes to put his "weapon" in his car.
So I think to myself: Was he hoping the deputy wouldn't notice that there was a picket knife in the midst of all his crap? If so, why bring attention to it by referring to it as your "weapon"? Or, was he so nervous about trying to sneak it in that he blurted it out? Or was he just dumb enough to not think ahead about the fact that he had to go through a metal detector AND that knives, regardless of their size and lethalness (yes I realize that is a word I just made up) are not allowed into a courthouse?
I'm going with the last option. I skirted around as he walked past me and watched as his dead-behind-the-eyes wife wandered around looking for the docket to find out what courtroom they needed to report to. I then put my simple manilla folder with documents to be filed and my keys in the bin and walked through the metal detector. (I didn't take my phone because this time, I knew I wouldn't need to call anyone.) I actually spent more time watching this yahoo and his antics than I did filing the documents with the court clerk. As I was walking back to my car, he was walking back in to the courthouse. I would love to be a fly on the wall in that courtroom!
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
I was afraid of this . . .
WHICH FAMOUS QUEEN WERE YOU IN A PAST LIFE?
You were Queen Victoria. Ascending to the throne in the tumultuous Industrial Revolution in England, Victoria ruled in a time where progress was at its highest pace. She was the first English monarch to have her picture taken by the revolutionary camera and she strategically married off all of her children and grandchildren to secure alliances within and outside of Europe. She was also a great believer in morality and family and was keen to uphold an image of purity and of a close knit family. When her much loved husband died, she remained in deep mourning for the rest of her life, always wearing black even many years after his death. She was a very stable and sensible woman who went on to become the longest serving ever English monarch and one of the most popular.
Victoria Victoria
As I look for pictures to horrify all my readers, I found some that show her in a different light. She was quite beautiful when she was young. Either that, or the artists were afraid she'd order their heads cut off if they made an ugly portrait of her!
You were Queen Victoria. Ascending to the throne in the tumultuous Industrial Revolution in England, Victoria ruled in a time where progress was at its highest pace. She was the first English monarch to have her picture taken by the revolutionary camera and she strategically married off all of her children and grandchildren to secure alliances within and outside of Europe. She was also a great believer in morality and family and was keen to uphold an image of purity and of a close knit family. When her much loved husband died, she remained in deep mourning for the rest of her life, always wearing black even many years after his death. She was a very stable and sensible woman who went on to become the longest serving ever English monarch and one of the most popular.
As I look for pictures to horrify all my readers, I found some that show her in a different light. She was quite beautiful when she was young. Either that, or the artists were afraid she'd order their heads cut off if they made an ugly portrait of her!
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
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